


Sad Dreams Never Come True

by rebelsfromstars



Series: What Happens After (War Is Won) [2]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Gen, Prompt Fic, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-02
Updated: 2019-01-02
Packaged: 2019-10-03 04:10:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,483
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17276825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rebelsfromstars/pseuds/rebelsfromstars
Summary: From Tumblr's Abstract Prompts.24. It Was Only a Dream. Hera-centered.





	Sad Dreams Never Come True

**Author's Note:**

> The second prompt I did for [pilotinthestars](https://archiveofourown.org/users/PilotInTheStars) which also turned out too long. There's a lot of angst here. But the ending is more fluffy.

“You know, we should go on the supply run soon. We’re lacking most basic things in the galley. And now that Ezra’s around, my shampoo runs out twice as fast. The kid swears he’s not taking it, but I know better.” said Kanan to her, as he entered the common room with a plate of sandwiches. Hera really wasn’t very picky when it came to food, but she preferred anything that Kanan made to the prepared meals, like ration bars.

Plus, Kanan was obviously an amazing cook. She smiled at him as she took one of the sandwiches.

“You can go even today, there’s not much to do around. Take Zeb and Ezra with you.” she said, before she bit into the sandwich. It tasted better than anything she had eaten throughout the week. Kanan smirked.

“I thought more of a solution like this: we make the list of what we need, send the kids, stay home and have time to ourselves,” Hera chuckled.

“Oh, really?” she teased him. His smile was a little different, more sweet and tender.

“Yeah, I think we deserve a break from all of them yelling all the time, don’t you think?” he asked. Hera put down the half-eaten sandwich to scoop closer to him, having her own arm against his.

She looked at him and saw eternal peace and love in his eyes.

“Yeah, I think we do,” she said, quietly, not taking her eyes off him. His expression was loving, the one that tugged a little at Hera’s heart. She reached up, her hand on his cheek, and kissed him raising to meet him.

It was a short kiss, a show of affection she wanted him to know, when it was possible their together planned alone time, could be easily disturbed.

Feeling his smile against her lips, and then seeing the light in his eyes, was something that she never knew could be so satisfying.

“Gonna go and tell them then,” he said, and with a quick perk on her lips, he was already standing.

Hera didn’t know why suddenly she felt very cold. There was a fear spiking in her, and she had no idea where it came from.

She stood up rapidly and turned to Kanan.

“Kanan!” she called out to him, like if her life depended on it. There was a strange sense of importance and vulnerability in the moment.

And when he turned to look at her, she felt like if the world started to crumble from underneath her feet. Everything felt like if it was floating away, the ground on which she was standing, the walls around her, the common room, everything was falling apart, but no Kanan, she could still see him, standing across her.

She started to feel really hot, suddenly. Was it the temperature in the room, or was it coming from herself? Her heart beat fast, and it ached, it ached so badly that she didn’t know what to do with it. Why did it hurt so much?

She got reminded of it when she felt hot flames surrounding them, almost swallowing them whole.

“Kanan, no,” she whispered, and there was uncrossable vast between them now, even when she still felt like if they were connected by the bond that only time, mutual understanding and respect could earn them. And in the root of it was laying something she would never thought of happening to her - true love.

And it was ending right before her eyes. He kept her from running to him and destroying herself as well, with his hand holding power she never understood, but was always very respectful of. The one that saved her countless times, the gentle power of love that was about to save her one last time. Her world felt like falling apart, it was, literally, falling apart. She reached out to him, she called to him. And the longer she was looking at his face, the more it was obvious to her how hard it was for him. His arms were quivering, two lonely tears running from his eyes. Her own was burning a path down her cheek.

There was something utterly beautiful and fearless in him right there. And if the circumstances were any different… But because of the bravery that she led him back to, now he was giving his life for her, and breaking her heart at the same time.

With the one final look at him, he pushed her gently away, far away from the danger, and it felt like if she was dying herself, watching him surrounding to the flames around him. Everything was burning, the room, her throat, her tears, him, her heart.

The push made her rapidly pass from the state of a dream to the state of consciousness, and Hera woke up with a scream of his name, her heart beating wildly, the dried tears on her cheeks.

She could only sit and try to catch her breath for the next few moments. A dream. It was only a dream. A dream that was her past, her memory. A flashback. She could feel the gulp in her throat and her eyes still burning, threateningly close to become a weep. She rested her forehead on her hand, trying to calm down. A past, it was in the past, she couldn’t change it. There was nothing she could do. If he didn’t do that they all would be dead. Not only them, and their family, but their son as well.

As if he could hear her, suddenly, a cry echoed through the ship. She was still shaking, but she got up. Jacen needed her.

She didn’t have it far. Just before he was born, she set up a little baby cot in the common room, aside from the nursery. She knew herself, and just like tonight, it was very convenient, when she fell asleep in the cockpit yet again.

Worried, she rushed to the coy. She reached down to her crying baby.

“Hey, Jacen, it’s me, I’m here,” she said, in the most soothing and relaxed voice that she could. She was proud of herself, it was barely shaking. He didn’t want to stop, so she picked him up and put safely in her arms. Holding him tight, she tried to shush him and calm him down.

“It’s me Jacen, it’s okay,” she kept on saying, bouncing him delicately. He was a little quieter now, but still didn’t stop crying. He was clinging to her shirt, like if he was afraid.

Hera checked him quickly. No need for a diaper change, he wasn’t hungry, and she was there. Why he was crying?

Calming him down, holding him, made her calmer as well. She never thought a baby could give her a sense of comfort.

Concentrated on rocking him, she didn’t realize at first that he was already calm. She caressed the back of his head.

“See, everything is fine, love,” she whispered to him. She kept on rocking, finding the rhythm soothing. It was then that she realized that he had to respond to sensing her own distress. That was why he started crying. It already happened a few times, but only now Hera realized that it might be it. And it most probably was a Force thing.

She tried to ignore the worry she felt and concentrated on comforting her son instead.

“I’m here, Jacen. It was only a dream.” she whispered, as she kept on rocking him. She turned her head to look at him. He was looking somewhere behind her shoulder, his thumb in his mouth, but he was way calmer now. “Only a dream.” she repeated, not knowing who she wanted to comfort more with those words - him or herself.

She secured him on her one arm and brought her other hand to touch his cheek.

“Hey there, little guy, look at me, look at mama,” she said to him. He turned his head to her at her delicate touch and the sound of her voice. She smiled at him. “There you go, little love. You’re so lovely.” she said, and all the smiling, and talking, made Jacen giggle, in that particular way that infants could laugh. Hera’s heart lifted at seeing all that joy on his face.

“We’re gonna be alright. You and I against the whole galaxy.” she said.

He was all in smiles and little giggles, apparently the idea speaking to him.

Hera had to believe that it would be true. But Jacen was giving her strength and hope in a way that she never anticipated could be possible for her. So even if she was still hurting, even if that hurt would never entirely stop, then she had him.

Holding him gave her the comfort she needed, and soon they both were fast asleep, no dreams this time.

And maybe for now it was for better.


End file.
